You’ll have a tough time connecting with others if they think you’re socially awkward.
That’s why today, we’re going to talk about how to not be weird when you interact with people.
I’m about to share with you the exact same process that I’ve used to become more charismatic in any situation.
What You'll Learn In This Post
1. Don’t Put People On A Pedestal
You see, it’s easy to feel tense if you often assume that people are better than you.
This will cause you to second-guess yourself all the time.
As a result, you’ll be too afraid to make mistakes because you don’t want to be criticized by others.
Check out this podcast interview with Jonathon Aslay, Author of What The Heck Is Self-Love Anyway, where he talks about how to feel good about yourself.
That being said, if you’re wondering how to not be weird, avoid putting people on a pedestal.
If not, then you’ll have a difficult time expressing your true personality during your interactions.
If you want to know how to relax around people, you need to validate yourself.
You can do this by making a list of your positive traits and all your previous accomplishments.
The more you do this, the faster you’ll learn how to like yourself.
You’ll realize that you also have a lot to offer in any interaction and that you’re someone worth getting to know.
You’ll be less intimidated by others and you’ll figure out how to be less self-conscious in any situation.
2. Put Your Attention On Others
If you’re wondering how to not be weird, you need to get out of your head.
Believe it or not, nobody is paying as much attention to you as you might assume.
The truth is, everyone’s too focused on themselves to begin with.
That’s why you don’t need to be overly concerned about what people might be thinking about you.
Trust me when I say that even if you do something embarrassing or say something silly, it wouldn’t matter.
I can assure you that most people won’t remember the incident by the time they get home.
To help you feel less nervous, you need to take the focus away from yourself and put it on others instead.
Remember, every person that you interact with has knowledge and experiences that you don’t have.
That’s why you should try to keep an open mind and see what you can learn from others.
By doing so, you’ll make anybody you talk to feel special.
Not to mention, it’s much easier to come up with the right things to say when you’re actually present during your interactions.
3. Learn To Read Social Cues
If you want to figure out how to not be weird, you have to be able to communicate effectively.
If not, then you may say or do things that could potentially offend others.
This can make people feel uncomfortable being around you which will cause them to avoid you.
To fix this issue, try watching a movie without the sound on.
Pay attention to how the actors behave and interact with each other.
Look at their body language and facial expressions closely.
Try to identify the underlying meaning of what they said and the way they expressed themselves.
And then, watch the movie again with the sound on to confirm your assumptions.
Doing this will help you get better at reading social cues, which in turn will make you less awkward.
By doing so, you’ll be a lot more likely to put yourself out there instead of always isolating yourself.
4. Stay Away From Sensitive Topics
Getting into a heated debate can turn any interaction awkward really fast.
If you’re wondering how to not be weird, stay away from sensitive topics at all costs.
This is especially true if you’re meeting someone for the first time.
Since you don’t know much about the other person yet, it’s best to exchange polite pleasantries first.
Make some small talk so you can get a feel for what the other person is all about.
Also, avoid talking about religion, politics, sex, and race since a lot of people have strong opinions about those topics.
The last thing you want is to get into an argument about something controversial.
Again, if you want to succeed socially, always be light-hearted, respect your differences and focus on finding commonalities instead.
By doing so, you’ll come across as more charismatic in any interaction.
I know for me, I’d rather be liked by others than be right all the time.
5. Work On Your Social Skills
Growing up in a traditional Asian family, academic success was my main priority.
I was led to believe that if I went to school, got good grades, and got a good job, then everything else will take care of itself.
That’s why I never learned how to put myself out there because I was always studying.
From Shy To Social
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If you can relate to that and you want to live a happier life, having technical skills just isn’t enough.
To feel more fulfilled, you need to have great relationships around you as well.
If you’re struggling socially and you don’t know how to be more outgoing, you can change your situation if you want to.
At the end of the day, becoming more socially adept is just like any other skill.
To help you get started, you can read books, listen to podcasts, and watch videos around this topic.
And then, do what you can to implement the things that you’re learning on a regular basis.
The better your social skills are, the more doors will open up for you in every area of your life.
This is definitely something worth learning so make sure you put some effort into it.
6. Get Some Feedback
Personally, I’ve worked with a lot of introverted engineers, programmers, and developers in the past.
Due to the nature of their jobs, they’re not really required to socialize with others all that much.
They sit in front of the computer all day coding and doing other technical things.
As a result, they don’t get a lot of feedback on how they’re coming across.
That being said, if you want to learn how to not be weird, you need to be aware of how others perceive you.
Even though you mean well, you might be doing some things that are putting people off.
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To implement this, find someone who you trust and who knows you well.
And then, get them to tell you how they think you’re showing up for others.
Ask them to discuss with you what you’re doing well and what you need to do differently.
Whatever they say, don’t take it personally.
Try to keep an open mind and take the feedback that you received seriously.
Take some time to reflect and do your best to make the necessary adjustments in the way you express yourself.
The sooner you can fix any mistakes you’re making, the more quality connections you’re going to make.
7. Know Your Audience
If you want to learn to not be weird, you have to be empathetic.
Before you tell your story or make a comment, put yourself in other people’s situations.
Remember, things can get awkward real fast if you don’t calibrate whatever you share.
For example, the same story will have to be delivered differently if you’re with your friends compared to your relatives, right?
Keep in mind that there are certain topics that appeal to different kinds of individuals.
When in doubt and you’re around people that you don’t know, be observant first.
Try to learn more about whoever you’re chatting with and do your best to gather relevant information.
The better you know your audience, the easier it’ll be for you to come up with topics that both of you will appreciate.
As a result, your conversations will flow much easier and you’ll figure out how to bond with others much faster.
8. Look More Approachable
As the saying goes, you never get a second chance to create a great first impression.
That’s why you have to pay attention to how you present yourself.
If you don’t look like it, then people may not take have you have to say as seriously as you would like them to.
The truth is we all make snap judgments about others right away.
Your style, body language, and overall demeanor are the first few things people see.
Check out this video if you want to know how to be outgoing and likeable.
To help you appear more friendly, you need to improve the way you dress.
Make sure your clothes are clean, well-fitting, and appropriate for the social situation that you’re in.
Also, unless you’re cold, avoid crossing your arms or legs.
Have an open body language by keeping your arms to your side, standing up straight, and pulling your shoulders back.
Maintain proper eye contact and have a genuine smile on your face.
When you look approachable, people will immediately assume good things about you.
As a result, they’ll be more open to hearing what you have to say and your conversations will feel more effortless.
9. Embrace Rejection
At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter who you are and what you do.
There’s no way you’ll be able to get along with everybody.
If you want to learn how to not be weird, you have to manage your expectations.
The same way that you don’t like some people, you can’t expect yourself to be able to get along with everyone, right?
That’s why you have to know how to not take things personally and stop making everything about you.
To succeed socially, you have to embrace rejection.
View it as a necessary experience when learning how to build a social circle.
Remember, there are billions of people in the world.
You never have to compromise your core values just to be accepted by others.
If you want to figure out how to meet like-minded friends, just focus on becoming the best version of yourself.
The more authentic you are, the faster you’ll find the right relationships for you.
10. Make Socializing A Priority
Remember, everything worthwhile takes time that’s why you have to be patient with yourself.
To become socially savvy, you need to stop looking for quick-fix solutions and be willing to put in the work.
If you want to learn how to not be weird, you need to stop playing it safe and be willing to be uncomfortable.
I know it sounds obvious but you’re not going to improve socially if you don’t leave your house and you keep avoiding people, right?
Check out this video if you want to become outgoing and talkative.
Just think of it like going to the gym.
The more days you show up and the more reps you put in, the more progress you’ll make.
The opposite is also true.
If you don’t use your muscles, they’ll eventually atrophy.
The same ideas apply with regards to learning to be more social.
The more events that you attend and the more interactions that you have, the faster you’ll figure out how to be less awkward.
That’s why you have to make socializing a priority.
By taking small actions repeatedly, it’s inevitable that you’ll figure out how to be more socially confident.
And when you do, you never have to miss out on opportunities to connect with anybody ever again.
Conclusion
If you’re wondering how to not be weird, I just shared with you my best tips.
Feel free to go through them again and implement them as much as you can.
And now, let’s turn it to you.
Which one of these tips are you going to implement first?
Are you going to work on reading social cues or on calibrating your stories?
Send me a message on Instagram and let me know.