If you’ve ever bailed on events last minute because you felt way too anxious, then you need to know how to stop feeling uncomfortable around people.
I’m about to share with you the exact same process that I’ve used to overcome my shyness and figure out how to be more outgoing.
What You'll Learn In This Post
1. Think Of Your Positive Traits
Imagine how good it feels when someone says something nice to you.
You can give yourself those good emotions over and over again if you want to.
So stop beating yourself up mentally and think of your positive traits more often.
From Shy To Social
Discover proven steps to approach and talk to anybody no matter how shy you are.
Remember to start small by complimenting yourself on things that are easy for you to appreciate.
By doing this consistently, you’ll realize that you actually have a lot to offer to any interaction.
You’ll start to see yourself as a high-value person.
This will help you raise your self-worth and you won’t be as intimidated by others.
As a result, you’ll be a lot more likely to put yourself out there instead of always being such a loner.
Again, if you want to learn how to stop feeling uncomfortable around people, make an effort to think positively about yourself.
2. Dress To Impress
As the saying goes, you never get a second chance to make a great first impression.
Whether you like it or not, your looks really do matter.
What you wear and how you groom yourself are the first few things that people see.
You can be the smartest and most interesting person out there.
But if you don’t look like it, then you may not be taken seriously by others.
Check out this podcast episode with Peter Nguyen, Founder of The Essential Man, where he talks about how to build the perfect wardrobe.
If you’re wondering how to stop feeling uncomfortable around people, you have to pay attention to how you present yourself.
The best way to do this is to figure out what kind of event you’re going to attend.
Whether it’s casual or formal, remember to dress accordingly.
In any case, make sure your clothes are clean, well-fitting, and have neutral colors.
If you want, you can add a statement piece like an accessory to spark conversations with individuals that you want to meet.
When you look like someone worth getting to know, more people are going to be inclined to interact with you.
3. Prepare Your Stories
It’s totally normal to feel nervous at any gathering when you don’t know what to talk about.
If you’re like most of our clients in our social skills coaching program, then you probably don’t have a lot of experience interacting with others in general.
You either work a technical job or you grew up in a very conservative environment.
If you want to know how to stop feeling uncomfortable around people, take the time to figure out what you want to say.
If you think about it, most people usually talk about the same things over and over again anyway.
That being said, prepare some stories regarding your work, your upbringing, places you’ve been to, events you’ve attended, and your interests.
Once you have these written out, review them as much as you can.
If you’re willing to, try recording yourself when you practice telling your stories.
This will help you observe your delivery and hear how you sound.
That way, you can make the necessary adjustments before you go out and socialize.
4. Pretend You’re Someone Charismatic
Your mind and body are interconnected.
By acting as if you’re already confident, you’ll change how you feel almost instantly.
All you have to do is to ask yourself what a socially competent individual would do?
Close your eyes and pretend that you’re that person as well.
If you want to figure out how to stop feeling uncomfortable around people, adopt the body language of someone who’s charismatic.
I recommend you stand up straight, pull your shoulders back, and keep your chin up.
Remember to smile, keep your arms to your side and maintain proper eye contact.
When you look confident and charismatic, people will treat you as if you are.
5. Make A Move Right Away
If you want to learn how to stop feeling uncomfortable around people, you have to build positive momentum.
And that’s not going to happen if you don’t take action.
That’s why as soon as you get to the event, scan the room and look for someone who seems friendly.
Follow the three-second rule and make a move right away.
Adopt a curious mindset and ask yourself what’s so interesting about this person.
Trust me, you’re not the only one who feels nervous around people they don’t know.
By making the first move, others will be so thankful that you started a conversation with them.
6. Be Present In Your Interactions
Don’t you hate it when the person you’re talking to isn’t fully paying attention to you?
From what I’ve noticed, those who struggle socially are so in their heads that they’re actually not present during their interactions.
If you want to deepen your relationships with others, take the time to be a good listener.
Give the person you’re with your undivided attention.
Put your phone away and really try to understand what they’re telling you.
When you do, you’ll improve your connection with everyone you talk to.
As mentioned before, do what you can to prepare your stories ahead of time.
But as soon as you’re in a conversation with someone, you just have to let things go.
When you’re in the moment, you’ll be able to come up with the right things to say a lot easier.
7. Assess Your Situation
Most people who struggle socially often have an exaggerated version of what failure looks like.
They focus on it so much that it cripples them from taking action.
In fact, this reminds me of a client that I’ve worked with before.
He literally thought that people were going to spit at him if he tried to talk to them.
As crazy as it sounded, he believed that to be true.
If you’re wondering how to stop feeling uncomfortable around people, you need to assess your situation more objectively.
Ask yourself what’s the worst thing that can realistically happen?
If you actually take the time to do this, you’ll realize that nothing is ever as bad as you might think.
For example, let’s say you’re at a party and you want to introduce yourself to someone you haven’t met before.
Well, a couple of things can occur.
The interaction can go really well and you make a new connection.
Or your mind goes blank and you have lots of awkward silences during your conversation.
Both can happen for sure.
But if you think about it, the worst-case scenario isn’t all that bad right?
That’s why you should always challenge your assumptions.
Don’t believe everything your mind tells you right away.
By assessing your situation, you’re a lot more likely to take risks instead of just playing it safe.
8. Be More Observant
Most introverts hate making small talk.
But whether you like it or not, this is something that you also need to get good at.
At the end of the day, you have to be able to exchange polite pleasantries with people you’ve never met before.
The better you are at making small talk, the faster you’ll build rapport with others.
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If you’re not sure where to start, use your environment to help you come up with small talk topics that you can discuss.
For example, let’s say you’re at a networking function and you want to connect with someone new.
You can just simply ask how they heard about the event and what they’re hoping to get out of it.
The key here is to get out of your head and follow your curiosity.
Avoid filtering yourself and just say the first thing that comes to mind.
If you want to learn how to stop feeling uncomfortable around people, being observant will really help you out.
9. Avoid Giving Short Responses
Personally, I’ve worked with a lot of engineers, programmers, and developers in the past.
I noticed that most of them have a bad habit of giving short responses when asked a question.
That’s why people find it hard to interact with them.
If you want to know how to stop feeling uncomfortable around people, you have to volunteer more information about yourself.
Check out this video if you want to know how to be talkative and keep a conversation going.
Make it easy for others to maintain a conversation with you by adding details to your stories.
Again, whatever you do, avoid just giving one-word answers.
That way, whoever you’re talking to will have lots of information to work with.
The more you share, the easier it’ll be for others to figure out how to keep a conversation going with you.
As a result, you’ll be able to find commonalities a lot easier and bond with each other much faster.
10. Have A Sense Of Humor
If you want to know how to stop feeling uncomfortable around people, stop being so serious all the time.
You need to improve your sense of humor and adopt a more playful attitude.
When you know how to make people laugh, you can lighten up the mood in any situation.
You’ll become a source of positive emotions and you’ll raise your status in any group.
Remember, being quick-witted comes down to your ability to think of different ways of seeing normal things.
To help you get started, what you’ll want to do is to observe the things around you.
And then ask yourself what else it reminds you of.
Try to make correlations with subjects that are seemingly unrelated.
Use your imagination more and get creative.
When you do this exercise over and over again, you’ll train your brain to be spontaneous.
This will help you think quickly on your feet which will help you learn how to banter better with others.
11. Stop Being So Self-Conscious
The fear of rejection holds most people back from putting themselves out there.
Most people who struggle socially are so worried about being judged by others.
If that sounds like you, the reality is, nobody is paying as much attention to you as you might think.
The truth is, everyone is so concerned about themselves anyway.
They don’t have time to worry about you.
Even if you make a mistake or do something silly, most people would’ve forgotten about you by the time they get home.
The way I see it, unless someone adds value to your life and has your best intentions, their opinion of you shouldn’t matter.
If you’re wondering how to stop feeling uncomfortable around people, don’t care so much about what people think.
By doing so, you’ll feel less self-conscious and you’ll be able to show your true personality during interactions.
12. Keep Showing Up
Small actions performed repeatedly produce massive results eventually.
If you want to feel more confident in social situations, just keep showing up.
You have to make the effort to interact with people on a consistent basis.
Check out this video if you want to know how to have a social life when you work from home.
The opposite is also true.
If you don’t take the time to go out and socialize, it’s easy to fall back into your old habits.
It’s no different than going to the gym.
If you don’t work out, your muscles will eventually atrophy.
In this case, the more experience you acquire interacting with others, the more comfortable you’ll feel in any social event.
But if you want to get results much faster, consider working with a social skills coach.
That way, you’ll have a proven plan to follow.
You’ll have someone give you feedback and keep you accountable as well.
As a result, you can finally get this part of your life handled.
You’ll learn how to put yourself out there socially and create more meaningful connections with others.
Conclusion
If you’re wondering how to stop feeling uncomfortable around people, I just shared with you my best tips.
Feel free to go through them again and implement them as much as you can.
And now, let’s turn it to you.
Which one of these tips are you going to implement first?
Are you going to work on preparing your stories or on being present during your interactions?
Send me a message on Instagram and let me know.