First of all, there’s nothing wrong with being an introvert.
But if you feel lonely because you have no social life, then you need to figure out how to become more extroverted.
Today, I’m about to share with you the exact same advice that I teach to our clients in our social skills coaching program.
What You'll Learn In This Post
1. Work An Overcoming Your Shyness
Due to misinformation, a lot of people confuse introversion with shyness.
They’re definitely not the same so allow me to explain what the differences are.
Being an introvert is a personality type.
They get drained after having too much interaction and like to recharge by spending time alone.
Check out this video if you want to know how to stop being shy and introverted.
When someone is shy, that means they feel awkward and nervous around people, especially those they don’t know.
They’re afraid of being judged by others which causes them to act timid in order to fit in.
That being said, introverts can be outgoing the same way that extroverts can be shy as well.
If you’re wondering how to become more extroverted, you don’t need to be someone that you’re not.
You just need to work on building your social confidence.
Remember, you have to talk to people every single day.
If you’re socially inept, you’re severely handicapping yourself from creating more opportunities in your personal, romantic, and professional life.
But with the right knowledge and enough practice, you too can figure out how to interact with people better.
2. Get Out Of Your Head
A lot of people who are shy and introverted have a bad habit of overthinking social interactions.
They freeze up when they’re talking to someone because they’re so worried about how they’re coming across.
They often feel nervous which prevents them from coming up with the right things to say.
The truth is, it’ll be hard to give off a great first impression if you’re not in the moment.
If you want to know how to become more extroverted, you need to control the way you think.
From my experience, the best way to become more present is to start a meditation practice.
Every morning, I recommend you spend some time having a quiet moment to be with yourself.
Close your eyes and focus on your breathing for a few minutes.
And then, pay attention to your thoughts without any judgment.
Just watch them come and go.
Remind yourself that you don’t need to react to any of them.
When you do this long enough, you’ll be able to slow down your mind and relax your body.
You’ll experience less anxiety and you’ll be able to think more clearly.
As a result, you’ll figure out how to relax around people and feel a lot more comfortable in any situation.
3. Have A Growth Mindset
In her book, Mindset, Carol Dweck talks about the difference between a growth mindset and a fixed mindset.
Those with a growth mindset believe that abilities can be developed through dedication and hard work.
They are resilient and view learning as necessary for success.
Like I said earlier, you too can figure out how to become more extroverted if you put some effort into it.
Check out this podcast interview with Paul McGregor, Mental Health Speaker, where talks about how to improve your mental health.
On the other hand, those with a fixed mindset believe that talents and intelligence are simply static traits.
Working hard at something is a sign that they’re not meant to do it.
Natural talent alone without effort will make them successful.
That being said, which mindset do you think you have?
Having awareness about the different types of mindset is all you need to start making a change.
Catch yourself when you’re feeling discouraged in your journey to improving your social confidence.
Whatever you do, avoid slipping into a fixed mindset at all costs.
Make a decision to shift your perspective and choose a growth mindset instead.
When you do, you’ll figure out how to overcome social anxiety and shyness a lot faster.
As a result, it’s inevitable that you’ll succeed socially.
4. Simplify The Process
If you want to know how to become more extroverted, you have to keep things manageable.
Otherwise, you’re going to feel discouraged and not take any action.
The best way to figure out how to put yourself out there is to prioritize your learning.
When you do, you prevent yourself from feeling overwhelmed.
From Shy To Social
Discover proven steps to approach and talk to anybody no matter how shy you are.
For example, when you’re starting out, just focus on making eye contact and smiling at strangers.
Once you’re comfortable doing that, say hello and ask them how their day is going.
After that, you can learn how to hold a conversation for a few minutes.
And then, you can figure out how to be witty afterward.
Eventually, you’ll be able to go to large events and engage in a group conversation effortlessly.
By setting small and easier goals first, you make the whole process less intimidating.
You’ll see quick wins and you’ll feel a lot more inspired to keep going.
5. Meet People Strategically
As a shy introvert, you have limited energy to socialize.
If you’re wondering how to become more extroverted, you need to be more intentional with how you connect with others.
My recommendation is for you to add a social component to your passions, hobbies, and interests.
Check out this video if you want to know how to make friends as an introvert with social anxiety.
For example, if you like dancing, take salsa lessons.
Join a hiking meetup instead of going by yourself.
You can sign up for a painting class if you want to meet more artistic individuals.
As you can see, learning how to make friends as an introvert can be enjoyable.
You can figure out how to meet people while doing something that you like at the same time.
That way, you can skip the small talk and jump into deeper conversations much faster.
6. Remove Your Filter
The fear of being judged prevents most people from speaking up.
They’re so afraid of looking bad that they pressure themselves to say something clever all the time.
If you want to know how to become more extroverted, you have to remove your filter.
Trust that what you have to say matters and that those around you will want to hear you out.
The reality is everyone is so concerned about themselves anyway.
They don’t have time to worry about you.
Even if you embarrass yourself or say something silly, don’t make a big deal out of it.
I can assure you that most people would’ve forgotten about you by the time they get home.
That’s why you need to stop overanalyzing everything and not care so much.
Quiet your inner critic and always challenge your assumptions.
By doing so, you’ll realize that nothing is ever as bad as you make it out to be.
As a result, you’ll take more risks and develop your courage.
7. Act As If You’re Charismatic
Your mind and body and interconnected.
When you change one the other follows.
By acting like someone who’s charismatic, you’ll change how you feel very quickly.
If you want to figure out how to become more extroverted, adopt an open body language.
I recommend you stand up straight, pull your shoulders back, and keep your chin up.
Make sure you smile, keep your arms to your side and remember to maintain proper eye contact with others.
When you look more socially confident, other people will treat you as if you are.
8. Share Details About Yourself
As a social skills coach, I’ve worked with a lot of engineers, programmers, and developers in the past.
Most of them are shy introverts and are socially inexperienced.
I noticed that they have a bad habit of just giving one-word answers when people ask them questions.
If this sounds like you, avoid doing this at all costs.
This makes it hard for anybody to keep talking to you because they don’t have a whole lot to work with.
For example, let’s say someone asks you what you do for work.
Instead of just giving a short response, make an effort to share more details about yourself.
Go deeper by talking about what got you into your career, how it makes you feel, and what you like about it.
That way, whoever you’re speaking with will have lots of opportunities to continue engaging with you.
If you want to know how to keep a conversation going with anyone, make sure you volunteer information about yourself.
By doing so, you’ll trigger other potential topics that both of you can discuss.
9. Work On Your Delivery
If you want to know how to become more extroverted, you have to work on your delivery.
At the end of the day, it’ll be hard for anybody to hear you if you’re too soft-spoken.
In order to hold people’s attention, you have to get comfortable speaking louder.
The best way to do this is to imagine the person you’re talking to is a bit further behind from where they’re situated.
That way, you’ll train yourself to project your voice more.
Also, make sure you raise your energy slightly when you’re talking.
Use your hands to accentuate what you’re saying and vary your tonality as well.
By doing these things, you’ll come across as a captivating storyteller.
If you’re not used to speaking in this manner, this will definitely require some practice.
If you’re willing to, I highly recommend you record yourself.
That way, you can observe how you talk and hear how you sound.
This will help you make the necessary adjustments before you go out and socialize.
10. Find Your Role Models
If you’re wondering how to become more extroverted, you don’t need to reinvent the wheel.
You can learn from those who are socially successful by studying them.
Tired Of Feeling Lonely?
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Once you find your role models, pay attention to how they think and the way they act in social situations.
And then, do your best to emulate them as much as you can.
As the saying goes, success leaves clues and all you have to do is follow them.
That being said, make an effort to surround yourself with charismatic individuals as often as possible.
By doing so, you’ll build your social confidence a lot faster because their mindsets and behaviors will rub off on you.
11. Change Your Self-Dialogue
Most people who struggle socially don’t treat themselves well.
Whenever they make a mistake, they speak to themselves in a very demeaning way.
Now let me ask you a question.
If you talk to others the way you talk to yourself right now, would you still have friends?
In order to improve the relationship you have with yourself, you need to change your self-dialogue.
Be more encouraging and speak to yourself the same way you would to a good friend.
Remind yourself that you’re doing the best you could with what you know.
Practice self-compassion and always be easy on yourself.
By doing this consistently, you’ll feel a lot more encouraged to take action and put yourself out there socially.
12. Make Socializing A Habit
If you want to figure out how to be more talkative as an introvert, think of it like going to the gym.
The more days you show up and the more reps you put in, the faster you’ll improve.
The opposite is also true.
If you don’t use your muscles, they will eventually atrophy.
The same ideas apply with regards to learning how to become more extroverted.
The more people you approach, the faster you’ll learn how to be less awkward.
That’s why you have to make socializing a priority.
By taking small actions repeatedly you’ll figure out how to be more socially confident eventually.
And when you do, you never have to feel like you’re missing out on opportunities to connect with people ever again.
Conclusion
If you want to know how to become more extroverted, I just shared with you my best tips.
Feel free to go through them again and implement them as much as you can.
And now, let’s turn it to you.
Which one of these tips are you going to implement first?
Are you going to work on overcoming your shyness or on adopting a growth mindset?
Send me a message on Instagram and let me know.